Resilience, reframing and toxic positivity

cultivate resilience and optimism, in the face of adversity, and assholes!

Spring has officially sprung! Last night here in Ireland as the clocks changed — officially welcoming brighter days. The energy of ‘newness’ which comes at this time of year is inspiring. Nature’s vibrancy directly impacts our emotional wellbeing and our ability to thrive. 

Of course, brighter days don't mean negative external factors won't continue to contribute to how we feel, no matter how healthy and strong our mindset is. Whether it's a brush with a nasty virus, a nasty person, or prolonged nasty weather — stuff, is going to impact us. Sometimes the sheer amount of ‘stuff’ takes its toll. With that in mind, I want to explore emotional resilience and the difference between two popular concepts: toxic positivity and reframing. There is a subtle shift you can use to bring you from the first to the second while building mental and emotional resilience. 

First, let's define toxic positivity. This is a term used to describe the overemphasis on positive thinking, to the point where it becomes toxic and dismissive of real human emotions and struggles. Essentially, toxic positivity is the idea that we should always be happy and optimistic, no matter what is going on in our lives. While it's certainly important to have a positive outlook, toxic positivity is harmful because it can make people feel like their struggles are not valid, or that they are somehow failing if they're not happy.

On the other hand, reframing is a technique used in positive psychology that involves taking a negative or challenging situation and viewing it from a more positive perspective. This is not the same as denying or suppressing negative emotions; rather, it's about acknowledging them and then actively choosing to look for the good in a situation. 

Reframing will help to cultivate resilience and optimism, even in the face of adversity, and assholes!

Mindful Musing  

"We can't stop the waves, but we can learn to surf." 

Life is full of ups and downs, and we can't control everything that happens to us. However, we can control our response to those events.

A hand-painted card I received from an inspirational client at the end of our 6-month mindset coaching journey.

Shifting Gears 

Having the courage to sit with strong emotions and not trail off into the thought pattern surrounding it is where freedom is held. It's not always easy but it is a skill that can be learned. I invite you to take a moment and reflect on: Where in your life are you clinging to the positive in a way that isn't helpful? Avoiding the reality of a situation can help us to cope in the moment, however, in the longer term going through the pain is often the only way past something.

It is okay and totally healthy to feel sad, angry, or frustrated. Life only brings to us what we are capable of dealing with — I promise you that.  Is there something you have been putting a positive spin on for too long? Ready to face it? This is your sign!  A useful affirmation to support you could be: "I trust in my Self and my ability to move through this with grace."

With love and a bucket full of non-toxic positivity,

Georgie